Stress: And the courage to be still

Stress: And the courage to be still

When I was a young mother, years ago, my infant son almost died from spinal meningitis and became profoundly deaf. That acute trauma turned into chronic stress because I was driven by self-blame and grief: should I have sought help sooner? Would that have saved his hearing?

When we experience acute stress, the “fight or flight” reaction kicks in. This worked when our ancestors were being chased by lions in Africa. The same things happened to them that happens to us today: the heart pounds, breathing escalates, eyes dilate and the digestive system shut down.

And now we know that the brain releases an amazing mixture of hormones and chemicals including cortisol, adrenaline and norepinephrine during acute stress.

This biological soup of chemicals is a hangover from our ancient ancestors even though we’re no longer fleeing from lions.

Cortisol: the “stress” hormone

As I frantically sought help after my son almost died and then was diagnosed as profoundly deaf, my system likely streamed cortisol—a steroid hormone made in the adrenal glands.

Our family had a rapidly closing window of time to make intense life-changing decisions: should he get a cochlear implant; should we use American Sign Language; or should we attempt to use voice?

Over time, I become deeply fatigued because I felt like I was being chased by lions for years. (See Adrenal Fatigue)

Increasing Stillness

Although there are many solutions to managing stress, when I stumbled on meditation and yoga during my search for calmness, I began a life-long learning journey.

The travel writer Pico Iyer says In his Ted Talks The Art of Stillness that we need to take conscious measures to open up a space inside of our lives to increased stillness. Meditation and mindfulness can build this capacity. I began a regular meditation practice and started to go on silent retreats.And felt a genuine shift in my inner being.

The courage to change

This was almost thirty years ago. There was less research and knowledge about stress and meditation then. I did need to reach deep inside for the courage to change. And I’ve had a lot of help from teachers and others in my search for calmness.

All of us have to choose. Each moment. Peace in every step, as the Vietnamese Buddhist monk Thich Nhat Hanh says.

At this moment, as you are reading. pause and close your eyes. Take one full deep diaphragmatic breath. Allow the body and mind to become deeply still. Invite the sense of “ahhh…” to radiate throughout the body and mind.

Do this every hour for the next four weeks and your life will change.

The courage to change comes from within each of us, at those critical moments in our lives when we are called upon to step forward. I invite you to choose stillness in your life.