Mindfulness starts with letting go of the stories we tell ourselves. It’s the difference between “looking” and really “seeing” something. Recently i had an experience where i was just looking and got involved in my story.
I was picking daffodils from the field near my house and I started telling stories to myself: How much longer will these beautiful daffodils last? Maybe I shouldn’t pick them, but leave them in the garden. They’re really only in bloom a couple of weeks and then they die anyway. Well, we all die so quickly. Life is so short. My mother died 15 years ago already and that means I’m probably only going to live another 15 years if I die at the same age she did!!
You can see that this story led me down a dark path to my own death. So busy in the mind that i wasn’t present with what was happening!! How often does that happen to you?
It doesn’t really matter if the story is pleasant or unpleasant, our “stories” continually take us away from being present in the moment.
Experience what you see
Mindfulness is about paying attention to present moment experiences with openness and curiousity and willing to be with what is happening in this moment. You might enjoy listening to Jon Kabat-Zinn, one of the great mindful teachers, talking more about mindfulness here in this video.
But what do we actually “see” or do we just “look”? Do we take the time to really absorb and experience what we are seeing?
When it comes to really seeing, simply being with what is can be a challenge.
We get caught up in the looking at a conceptual level. We switch from our “experiential” self to our “narrative” self.
So the mindful or experiential self might pause to feel the cool spring rain and absorb the delicate aroma of the daffodils. By seeing deeply, I might have noticed the delicate edges of the fluted flower, the depth of the flowers themselves and how long the centre thing is (what is even the right name? When “seeing”, who cares?) How varied each one’s colour is, some bold, some paler and some strong and others falling forward.
When I approach the experience with curiousity and acceptance, and step out of the “story” I can truly have the experience of the daffodils.
Looking Without Judging
Our unconscious judgment of situations and of other people is nearly constant. When I began mindfulness meditations, I was astonished at how much I judged what was happening around me.
What if we allow ourselves to let go of judgment and just take in what we are seeing without narrative—and without judgment?
In this time of deep division and unrest, it is possible that “slow looking,” especially when we move about in the world, may help us settle into a space in which we simply allow others to be as they are and to allow ourselves to be as we are, without judgment.
Mindfulness Practice: Enjoy this “seeing meditation” practice
The next time you leave your home to go for a walk, really take the time to absorb what you see. Whether you come across a tulip, daffodil or another human being, drop the story and take in what you see fully.
It’s possible that this way of really “seeing” what is around you can help you appreciate what you are seeing with appreciation.
By tuning into yourself, by seeing and listening to what is going on both within and without, you can begin to be without that continual story and judgement that so many of us carry.
Listen to William Wordsworth’s poem, I wandered Lonely as a Cloud or read it below…a glorious Daffodil poem…just for you…
I wandered lonely as a Cloud
That floats on high o’er Vales and Hills,
When all at once I saw a crowd
A host of dancing Daffodils;
Along the Lake beneath the trees,
Ten thousand dancing in the breeze.
The Waves beside them danced,
but they Outdid the sparkling Waves in glee:—
A Poet could not but be gay
In such a laughing company:
I gaz’d – and gaz’d – but little thoughts
What wealth the shew to me had brought:
Who fancied what a pretty sight
This Rock would be if edged around
With living Snowdrops? circled bright!William Wordsworth
For oft when on my Couch I lie
In vacant, or in pensive mood,
They flash upon that inward eye
Which is the blifs of solitude,
And then my heart with pleasure fills,
And dances with the Daffodils.
William Wordsworth
